Where I stand.
At this moment I’m deciding whether or not to stay in Houston. Every direction has a feeling of ‘…eggh’, to it. San Antonio, Lubbock, Louisiana…. I’m gonna save up some dough for an apartment, bills. the usual? ….so much planning….
At this moment I’m deciding whether or not to stay in Houston. Every direction has a feeling of ‘…eggh’, to it. San Antonio, Lubbock, Louisiana…. I’m gonna save up some dough for an apartment, bills. the usual? ….so much planning….
I am so jonesing to go the gun range. I am pumped from working out and also had to deal with some punk kids dealing at my corner gas station. Maybe I need a paintball weekend or something? idk. frustration. …….anger. the hood is kicking up again.
Mah honey bunny and I are getting all sorts of into eachother again. Love is a circle, I’ve come to know, and just when i think things are about to break, …..he flips the script. We talk. We play. We cook. We do all sorts of things together. It’s nice!
Interviews today. yet again. Gym, shower, interviews, meet ups. I’m a social butterfly that likes to be left alone, really. I’m coming to terms with this. I socialize so much better behind a screen/phone/controller & head set. Trust issues, i suppose? But I’m working on these things. I miss being around my friends. Beware the ways of hermit-ville. it’s addicting in it’s comfort & security.
From time to time I wonder about my purpose here. I want to help, but where do I start. ……well… that’s crap, I’m actually looking forward to starting EMT courses. I’ve seen enough blood And horror that I think I can actually bring something to the table, so to speak. I’m Excellent in an emergency situation. I’m kick ass and ….modest too, huh? I’m Driven and happy about it =)
I really hope it works out. I’ve got lots of cleaning up to do. I want things to be better. Safer. I need to let go of the dark parts of my past. Look forward. To the future. There’s always hope in the future.
Oh Hunny bunny, how you tease. We dance around eachother and constantly flirt. It’s a constant mating dance, i swear. but i do love to dance with him. The way I see it, we are like stars circling around eachother, speratically clashing and rumbling in our own gravity. Why do I love my honey bunny? because he gives me passion. And that gives me freedom. Ohhhh yarrrrrr
…and according to him, i’m just not worth that anymore. on the bright side, which is so very dim, without the weight of love, I could fly high and far far away. Trouble is that only have one wing.
He’ll stay here, happy in this life he built & trusts so much. His life never brings him troubles, that’s my blessing alone. I’ve drained all the honey from my bunny. he hears my apologies, he just never listens. I can’t see his love anymore, but once upon a time I felt it.
There are so many things going on. We all get so damn distracted. And it’s hard to see what’s going on when you are in the middle of a hurricane, wind, debree, rain, pain… it all just swallows us whole. But when it passes it’s alot clearer. You can see what you’ve SHOULD have done. What you should have held on to, and what you needed to drop. but it’s ok. You still have air in your lungs, and that’s something.
Soo Sweet!
(via kodaiamborn)
Yeeeeeeesssssss!
(Source: followuntilyouloveme, via geassblake)
(Source: tls-asianrocker, via geassblake)
A restaurant has servers that work.
(Source: ivegotthemagicbaby, via savorydeviate)
This is a really nice photo.
(Source: jairusvirus, via kodaiamborn)
I’m a Horse, according to the Chinese calendar. Saggitareus (of Course the hardest one to spell) and Blessed to be born on the 12th day of the 12th month. My grandmother was born on the 1st day of the 1st month. Some people like cats better, ferrets, bunnies, oh I do love them all but when it comes down to it ……I love dogs. Big & little. I was always raised with an animal around. When i was younger, knee high to a grasshopper you may say, i recall playing out in the back yard… Winter…
….It was cold, with snow (Way back when it snowed in Houston) drizzled over the leafs that covered the earth. The grass didn’t dare to grow cold. The first animal to be with me was a bichone Friese (…..I’ll look that up later), “SPUNKY G. Squirrell” Spunky , for short. He was this little mass of white curls, I remember my dad showing me how to hold him so he wouldn’t feel insecure. “Make him feel safe” was what my daddy told me. So I did. I cradled him like a baby and I started sniffing around his ears and eyes. Like his momma would. Nuzzling his furr around like I’m slowly looking for something. Easy…Peaceful. Secure.
Robert Bailey….Jr. I believe. He’s in the army, off fighting for Freedom. I never met him. I talked to him on the phone. Great guy. Beautiful soul really. Kinda like a Kindred spirit? ….God I miss talking to him. Actually it wasn’t talking. He was the one always talking. I loved hearing him talk. He’d go on and on about his friend Danny, I think? Sorry…it’s been years. OH! we even joked about one time when Danny was passing through one of our city airports and I’d slip something in his bag….like an inside joke. I never went trough with it of course. Legalities, stress of Finding said bag, and not to mention the amount of security & people. (People freak me out) We met through W.O.W. and had a blast! He’s level up like a maniac and……I chose what hair style I wanted for my nightelf that week. (didn’t i just rant about being a girly girl? …….It’s hard being me) I stopped talking to him. out of respect for my honey bunny. but i still miss his voice. & the presence that came with it. Love you, Homie! Best Wishes. I Salute you, Sir.